Module 3: Frequential Pickup
The next technique you’re going to use is “Frequential” Pickup. I’ve coined this term and it’s appropriate for situations where you see the same girl over and over again.
It could be at work, where you bump into her or see her in the hall a couple of times a week. It could be in your college or university, maybe a cute girl you see from time to time. It could be any situation in which it will not be the only opportunity you see them. A good example is staff in restaurants and similar places.
It’s done over time, so there’s no pressure
This is actually one of the easiest ways to connect with women because it’s done over time and you don’t need to put too much pressure on yourself.
On the other hand, if you’re walking down the street and see your dream girl, and you know that you have to get her there and because you’re never going to see her again, then it’s big pressure.
- You don’t need to close her all at once. If you know you’re going to see her over and over again it makes things a lot easier. The mistake most guys make in this situation is they think they have to do everything at that moment.They see their neighbor or someone who lives in their building and they think they need to corner her next time they see her in the elevator and they’ve only got ten floors to get her number and do what they need to do.
- Start off slowly and build. Frequential Pickup works like this: When you see her the first time, you’ve got no contact. You want to just start by nodding your head, or just give a quick wave and a “hey”.The next time you see her you want to extend it a little bit by saying, “Hey, how’s it going?” You’re giving her a friendly hello. The next time you see her you can say, “Hey, how’s it going, good to see you. What’s your name, by the way?” Or, if you’re in a situation like in an office you want to say something like, “What department do you work in?”
- Ask a relevant question. Pick a question that’s related to the environment in which you keep seeing her. If it’s a neighbor, you could say, “Oh, are you my neighbor? Do you live here or are you visiting someone? I see you around sometimes.” Think of an appropriate question to ask, no matter what situation you’re in. That gives you a slightly longer interaction.
- Build from there. You ask a question based on the situation, then introduce yourself and get her name. Next time you see her you can say, “Hi Sara, how are you doing today?” If you see her on a Monday you can start saying, “How was your weekend?” If you see her on a Friday you can say, “Oh hi, do you have plans for the weekend?Are you going to get out and have some fun?” You then get to a place where you’ve gone from nothing or just a non-verbal nod, to getting to the point where you’re having these interactions and conversations that could be five or ten more minutes long depending on the situation.
Restaurant Frequential
An example from my own life is a restaurant I go to about once a week. I know a lot of the staff and now see them outside of the restaurant. The way it started was I went the first time and said hello to everyone.
The next time it was like, “Hey good to see you again, how are you doing?” Then it evolved into asking the waitress what she likes on the menu and what her favorite dessert was. She told me, and they brought it and she came over and asked how I liked it. So I built up a little bit of interaction.
Take it to the next level
Next time you go you’re really friendly. You can say, “Hey how’s it going? Good to see you.” And you’re friendly to the rest of the staff there as well. You want to get their names and introduce yourself.
You can talk a little bit about how much you like the place, and that sort of thing. Or if you go with a friend, introduce the friend to them. Just have the start of a little interaction.
It’s very easy
From there it’s very simple. I talked to a girl who works in a restaurant recently and we had a couple of interactions like I’ve described above. Then next time I went, the conversation drifted to other stuff. I asked her how many days a week she works, and what time she finished.
Then I asked if she ever goes to bars or clubs and she said she sometimes does. I was with a couple of friends, so I said, “My friends and I are going to this club, and you should come.” After she got off work that night she showed up at the club and things progressed from there.
Take your time; it’s not a one-shot-deal
So instead of seeing the situation as a one-shot-deal and thinking you’ve got to snap her up in one shot, you actually have a lot of time. You can do it over weeks or even months.
The optimal time span is probably five meetings or so, just to get her used to you and comfortable seeing you and gradually extending that interaction more and more over time.
Get a feel for how receptive she is
What you’re doing during this time is sensing how friendly and receptive she is. So if you’re always getting a very friendly reaction, if she’s always happy to see you and her face lights up and she always talks to you and seems to enjoy it, then you know that you’re on the right track.
If she’s cold and always in a rush
Even when you think she might not need to be, you don’t need to progress it and go to that next step. You can leave it at that level, where you’re friendly to each other but not too much.
If she’s cool, suggest a date
Get a feel for where she’s at. If it’s looking good, start talking about things that are outside of that situation. Start talking about things that are outside of work, and then you can go to suggesting a date.
This is a no-brainer
This is extremely simple. You don’t have to think about having a long conversation and getting her number and trying to seduce her right there and then.
All you need to do is gradually build it up over time, because you’ve got the luxury of seeing her over and over again. Of course you can also use this at your college or university very effectively with people in your group or your class, or people that you see around campus or whatever.
It’s not complicated
Go out and just start a lot of those interactions. Start by saying “Hi”, introducing yourself and getting their name. Ask them a simple question. It can be anything.
Ask what courses they’re taking, what department they work in, whether they’ve lived in the building for a long time, whether they’ve worked in that restaurant for a while, and so on.
It doesn’t have to be complicated. It can be something very simple just to extend the interaction. Then go from there, making the conversation longer and longer.
Be sociable and let things flow – and create a whole new pool of girls
Take the pressure off getting the number. Don’t even think about it. Think about just being sociable and gradually increasing it over time.
If you start doing that you’ll have another whole pool of girls that you can take on dates and seduce. You do this by using the Frequential Pickup method, instead of going for it all in one shot.
Go ahead and try it and I’m sure it will work well for you.